The Grass Isn't Always Greener On The Other Side

"Never saw it coming
All of your backstabbing
Just so, you could cash in on a good thing
Before I'd realized your game

I heard you're going 'round
Playin' the victim now
But don't even begin feelin' I'm the one to blame

'Cause you dug your own grave" 

~Christina Aguilera 

Dating is really something else now-a-days... You meet someone, talk to them, text back and forth for a little while and see that you actually really like this person soo.... You go out. Movies. Dinner. And sooner or later you get intimate. Normally how it goes. It's also 2010, and unless you are in a relationship with someone more then likely all eggs are not being placed in one basket and there's a third party somewhere. It may not be serious. Maybe someone they just talk to here and there, flirt with a little bit but know there is always someone before you came along. 

Why do we do that? Because everyone has a need or want to "upgrade." We "monkey bar" from person to person depending on what the next one has to offer you. Men and women do it. I'm guilty of having done it before and I'm also guilty of acting outta spite. I knew I had done it in my past but I recently made it clear to myself that I also do it in the present. But I don't do it intentionally. I do it because I don't wanna let myself "go" with someone that doesn't deserve it. I don't want to be taken for a fool. 

Perfect example. I was dating this guy for months, I would say about 7 maybe 8 and shit was cool. He was very open with the fact that he was seeing other women and I couldn't get mad at that because we were both single... like he said "Im single and just having a good time. I don't know why you don't do the same." Problem with that statement was that I was having fun, but the fun I was having was with him. He also had said to me that "we're acting too much like a couple and it makes me uncomfortable," smh so me being me I stepped the fuck back. And slowly but surly shit just changed between us. He started doing his own thing and I started doing mine. He was still my go-to guy when I needed some lovin but we weren't how we used to be. 

He noticed that I wasn't "acting" normal. It wasn't that I was acting any kinda way it was the fact that I started pulling myself back from him. I started doing to him what he had been doing to me for months... <--- SPITEFUL. *shrugs* I didn't want to be hurt or have him thinking that I was some dumb broad he was just gonna get over on. But the issue that I'm having with this scenario is not that he pushed me to the side to do his thing.... it's that when I did to him what he did to me it was an issue. In his eyes I was wrong. In his eyes I didn't care. In his eyes I was playing games. Nicca WHAT?!?! I was doing the exact same thing he was so how is it that I get the short end of the stick and get bitched at for it??

I'll never completely understand the way men think... EVER. You made your bed now lay in it. This is why I want guys to keep it dougie with me so we both have a clear understanding about what we are. I don't fuss about what is and what isn't if I KNOW, but if you say one thing and act another then I'm gonna react based on your actions and I know quite a few of my friends that do the same thing.

Men do it allll the time, say the three words that makes a woman think that maybe just maybe he really wants to be with you, "I Love You." That statement is thrown around so much it's sad honestly. I don't want anyone that Im with to feel obligated to say those words to me EVER. I don't care if we have been "together" for over a year, dont say it if you dont mean it. I would rather have a guy tell me "I love having sex with you" then saying "I love you" JUST to keep having sex. And then men wonder why women act all crazy on them... "Thin Line Between Love And Hate" is a prime example of the L word being thrown around and a bitch going psycho on his ass. 

You never know out here is all Im saying. Be careful. 

I would really like shit to change but I know it wont. Im tired of the double standards, tired of everyone sleeping with everyone, tired of real love slowly dying. 

Smooches xoxo